Looking around at the world of relationships and sex between men I've always had the feeling that something was not quite right. Many of the things which seem to form an intrinsic part of ‘gay culture' or the ‘gay scene' seem to be the product of hundreds of years of repression or just a mere reaction to that repression. Cruising, anonymous sex, darkrooms, sex in public places all come from a need to hide and live sexual contact between men as something forbidden or unacceptable.

Despite the current climate of a certain acceptance of male-male love and sex in many western countries, much remains unchanged. Men, perhaps simply by their up bringing as men, despite accepting their homosexuality or bisexuality, still have problems about expressing their emotions and feelings and especially towards other men.

To some extent, the way the 'gay scene' or 'cruising scene' is seems to even make male-male relations worse. Lots of sex or possibilities for sex between men but mostly fleeting, short lasting relationships, a lack of communication, mistrust, fear of going deeper into relations, a lack of affection, a lack of friendship and the kind of camaraderie I have always thought should be the most important part of male-male relationships.

When I set up this group I wanted to create something positive and healthy, albeit rather shocking in its objectives at first sight (friendship between men with mutual masturbation - commonly known as ‘jack-off buddies').

From a sexological point of view, I have taken care that the group and its philosophy meet a series of requirements according to which sexology normally considers sex to be ‘healthy' or ‘unhealthy'. I sincerely think that this group meets all the requirements in the left-hand column and I have tried not to fall into any of the points in the right-hand column.

Sexology uses a table like the one below to distinguish between healthy and unhealthy sex: